Monthly Archives: January 2004

My Bitch’s Bitch

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A tip of the hat

I’ll keep this simple so you’ll be sure to understand. First, to all the morons who insist on wearing a toque indoors: perhaps you don’t understand how a toque was designed to work. It’s supposed to keep your head warm when it’s cold. And where is it mainly cold? That’s right, outdoors. So unless you suffer from a rare disorder that prevents you from being able to regulate your own body temperature, TAKE OFF THE STUPID TOQUE INDOORS! YOU LOOK PATHETIC! Secondly, to all those idiots walking around outside these days without a toque: perhaps you don’t realize this is Canada and it’s winter. I know you’re probably very worried about messing up your “funky hairstyle” but it’s time you realized that when its -45 degrees out and you’re out walking around without a toque, you don’t look hip or fashionable. You just look stupid, almost sad really, like you never learned how to properly dress yourself. SO PUT ON A HAT FOR CHRIST’S SAKE! YOU’RE MAKING ME COLD JUST LOOKING AT YOU! Lets review: toques are for outdoors when it’s cold….class dismissed.
-Toqued off

From Love the Way We Bitch! – The Coast (Jan 22-Jan 29 2004)